Inside by Ayra Kirosaku

Good afternoon my beloved readers :)
What will I bring you today?
No, it won't be some deep (or maybe not that deep) reflection.
This time it's my poem.
I won 2nd place in own creation in Slovakia.
I really put my heart into this one and mayb it will be a little bit depressive but what can I say...
that's me...if you look at me properly you can see that "black" aura all around me :D

I know that my reciting could be better but I was trying my best :) and I should work on my facial expressions :D

The trust of the innocent is the liar's most useful tool.

So I'm here again.
And now with more reasonable article.
I was inspired to write this thanks to one girl on tumblr.

What is the trust?
And who can you trust to?
Can we believe to everything what people tell us?
The answer is easily ...no.
Many people are working in that kind of industry where...if they want to earn some money they have to deceive people.It happens everywhere but at least we can avoid it....if we're paying attention on what's going on around us...
People are always trying to look like someone else.
One of my classmates used to ...and she is still doing it...copy me.
I really hated it but I was silent. I didn't say single word...
and when I was in our library because of competition...she said...
"I want to study translating and interpretation." what is specialization which I want to study.
"Oh really? What a coincidence. I also want to study it."
"You copy cat...I wanted to study it first." said she.
"Oh, really, don't tell me. I want to study it for at least 4 month or so."
she looked down and then she started telling to everyone.
"I'm going in her footprint. At first I wanted to study psychology...and now I want to study translating and interpretation."
And now?
She's always trying to be better than me in everything. She's copying my words...and then she's trying to look like...ah i did nothing wrong...don't look at me with that look of yours.
But what is the most sick about this....is that thing that she still considers herself as my friend.

It really makes me sad just to look about it...people should be unique...original...but please you're doing the worst thing you can....stop deceiving yourself...it will be painful when you bumb into the true.

The language of friendship is not words but meanings.

Good evening my beloved readers.
Another week has started and something is telling me it will be and long week.
And that brought me to do some thinking....
About friendship...
About that how life is unfair...
About the reason why I've turned to living zombie (because of my insomnia)

And recently I really miss someone with who I can talk honestly with...because I need my bestfriend here...
Well recently everything was hard because I'm thinking a lot and life is getting harder when so many ideas overflow your poor head.
To be honest this was supposed to be a deep article...but my plans changes...because my step-father and his friend can't be slowlier and I here every single word here so I can't properly think thanks to my headache.

And I totally forgot what was that I wanted to  write...so I guess I will let it be.
But I just want to tell thanks to all people who support me in my dream to become a model.
To be honest I've started to work on my body properly and I'm taking care of my face too so I thought that I could set some blog as diary...for what I did for my health and so on. But this one still will be one for my deep thoughts.

If I can't be beautiful, I want to be invisible

This quote is another smart sentence of Chuck Palahniuk.
I really admire him for his quotes...and I was trying to find something about beauty...and then I found this.

Well, what do you think being beautiful means?
What do you think being model means?
How do you think a perfect person looks like?

We should know that in ancient times people didn't mind how women look so much. They didn't use make-up and such things...it was just natural beauty. Just she and her nature.
But I'm dissapointed because of one thing.
Ideal of woman.
Do you know how this world presents perfect woman?
Skinny girl...really skinny...
she's often suffering from anorexia...
what is not healty.

And that pressure on girls nowdays is ubelievable.
Just imagine...you want to fit somewhere. You don't want to be something special...
So you're trying to find a way to your "finish..."
Unfortunately some girls want to do it in all costs...
They're on diets which are practically starvation....
they suffers from anorexia and bulimia....

Girls I want to tell you...one thing you already are beautiful as you are.
You should better know it before you do some stupid thing :)

Ayra's face in many ways

A noisy day behind me...
Well my head hurts...
And sun was pretty hot...
but I had an amazing day.
And also my leg still hurts because of my yesterday's cramp.
Actually yesterday I woke up because of cramp in my leg and it's still not gone. So walking is kinda hard for me now ....that means I rather used bicycle today :D
Even though during the morning I had appointements with doctors so it took a lot of time...
but after that ...it turned to a better angle.
I took some photos when I got back home...
and after it I decided to watch my boyfriend.
If I find some free time tomorrow I will write here about graduation at our school :)
Everywhere it's different after all and tomorrow I have some kind of duty
from Slovak Language- 12,00 to 15,00 and English from 17,00 to 18,30.
It looks like a pretty long day right?
well...enough of my senseless talking (today it's really senseless I should rather write reflection it makes more sense.)
So good night everyone and here you have

Two beauties without face

Good afternoon.
It was really a busy day yesterday.
We had to prepare classroom for oral part of graduation.
Good luck to all my seniors who has three days of examining in front of them!
I'm sure you will do well.
Well, also I went for a long walk with my boyfriend.
I rather won't count how many kilometres we did.
But we met with my good friend and we had an awesome day.
We watched motocross and I was also forced to swing one little kid....and thanks to that he didn't have teeth I understood nothing...
So I always just nodded and I tried to seem that I agreed with him deeply.
Well and also there was a little girl who was staring at me.
Believe me you haven't seen anything scarier. It reminded me the Grudge...with one difference...
that girl was a blond.
Well, I'm going to end this article because I'm at my grand aunt place so I'm going to help her
And also here's a photo from yesterday which was taken by my boyfriend.

All my feelings

Well I told you about the competition I was second in finals...
Well all my feelings are back now when I see this photo.
When we went back I was really upset because I was second...
but now I have to smile when I see this...
because it was one of my most beautiful experience with school.

I usually hate trips because they're giving me headache...or I'm depressed thanks to them
but this wasn't that case.

I have beautiful memories and I hope that I will experience something like this again.
And the next time I will get the first place.
I promise. :)

Ayra Kirosaku here again

Well, did you miss me?
I missed my blog because I didn't have any place where I could pour my heart.
Well lot of things changed from my last article.

For example I had an english contest and I finished 2nd at Slovak finals...unfortunately I was supossed to be first...but the jury didn't want to give all the prices to our school. Isn't it sad? I don't want to put my diploma on the wall just because of that.

But now something more...I decided to improve my singing skills and also my modeling skills (when I'll have a photographer)
so I set up few pages where can you find my covers or photos.
Facebook fan page
Twitter
Deviantart
Youtube
I'll be happy I you follow me anywhere :) so go on and don't be shy.